The Pope’s new Butler

“Pardon me, sir, but are you  proposing to enter Saint Peter Square in that mitre?”

I knew that the time had come when Benedict must show that iron resolution of his which has been so widely publicized. In the matter of head-joy Jeeves is not in tune with past liturgical thought, his attitude being best described, perhaps, as progressive experimentalist, and right from the start I had been asking myself what his reaction would be to the a mitre of Pope Benedict XV with delicate gold embroidery which I had found in his absence. Now I knew I could see at a glance that he wanted no piece of it. I, on the other hand, was all for this traditional lid. I was prepared to concede that it would have been more suitable for formal announcement wear, but against this had to be set the fact that it unquestionably lent a refinement to my appearance. In my voice, therefore, as I replied, there was a touch of steel. Yes, Jeeves, that, in a nutshell, is what I am proposing to do. Dont you like this mitre?

“Sir well if you must, but could I persuade you to substitute that crozier with something much simpler perhaps compose of a long branch?”

I saw that nothing was to be gained by bandying words. I turned the conversation to a pleasanter and less controversial subject like talking about the weather.

* Pieces lifted from “Stiff Upper Lip” by P.G. Wodehouse