We’ve been waiting for the TTOE the Theological Theory of Everything that can explain both religious belief and Apple fanboyism.
In a recently screened BBC documentary, UK neuroscientists suggested that the brains of Apple devotees are stimulated by Apple imagery in the same way that the brains of religious people are stimulated by religious imagery.
…According to the neuroscientists, the scan revealed that there were marked differences in Brooks’ reactions to the different products. Previously, the scientists had studied the brains of those of religious faith, and they found that, as Riley puts it: “The Apple products are triggering the same bits of [Brooks’] brain as religious imagery triggers in a person of faith.”
“This suggests that the big tech brands have harnessed, or exploit, the brain areas that have evolved to process religion,” one of the scientists says. A meeting with the Bishop of Buckingham, who reads the Bible using his Apple iPad, appeared to back up this assertion. He pointed out how the Apple store in, for example, Covent Garden has a lot of religious imagery built into it, with its stone floors, abundance of arches, and little altars (on which the products are displayed). And of course, the documentary doesn’t fail to give Steve Jobs a mention, calling him “the Messiah”. [Source]
This explains everything. When I was an atheist I was a Windows user and an Apple hater. When I came to have faith in God the dendrites in my neurons were redirected enabling faith and subsequent susceptibility to Apple fanboyism.
Actually stories of this type just numb me with blasts of stupidity and craptastic assumptions. Materialistic reductionism of this type reminds me of the John Cleese video where he poses as a professor pointing at different parts of the brains and saying things like “This part of the brain is where the belief in .. comes from” and finally pointing again to and saying “This is the part of the brain where we get the idea that this part of the brain.
MRI Scan shows the triggering of the same bits of brain as religious subjects thus Apple is a religion. Wonder what bits of brain causes you to come to that stupid conclusion.
7 comments
Well, figure that since God exists and we were made to worship Him, He also gave us the necessary senses and mechanisms to perceive and appreciate him. Is it any surprise that those same faculties can be directed towards some lesser object? Why else would we have been warned against idolatry? (As well as against all the other abuses of our other faculties, in other commandments.)
When man refuses to worship God, he doesn’t simply cease to worship. He chooses some other item to elevate. I think this article is more a case of “scientists prove water is wet”.
—> Though I always find it funny that neuroscientits still believe in the existence of color and sound and all that other nonsense, when everyone knows you can recreate those so-called “senses” by simply stimulating the parts of the brain evolved to give people those impressions. Some people just need to believe in “sight” and “sound” and so forth, I guess because they feel insecure with the real world or something.
Um… a much better assumption would be something like “hey, maybe this area lights up for symbols of trust? Familiarity? Strong emotion?
I gotta say, the Apple-Worship jokes just write themselves, though.
And they say that an apple a day keeps the doctor away! What will they say next?
Who can we trust nowadays? Go Figure! 🙂
Shalom
Since these parts of the brain evolved and are simply hard-wired to produce these feelings, we can conclude that Steve Jobs doesn’t exist.
Apple fanboyism is a religion? You’ve gotta be kidding me. Religions can only aspire to the widespread level of devotion that Steve Jobs and Apple enjoy.
Even our Saints individually criticized the papacy much more often than apple customers combined criticize Steve Jobs.
If only I had the devotion to Our Lord that Apple Customers have to Steve Jobs and his vision, I’d be so much closer to receiving the Beatific Vision.
If only we trusted Paul VI and said no to the highly popular contraception and abortion industry the way the Apple community trusted Steve Jobs and said no the highly popular Flash Player – we’d be a much healthier community.
If only we gave Natural Family Planning a chance help plan our families while respecting natural law and the gift of fertility the same way the Apple Community gave iTunes a chance to help plan a music collection while respecting the laws of copyright and the gift of artistry – we would be a much more numerous and authentic community.
If 10% of North Americans categorically refused to vote for pro-abortion politicians the same way 10% of North Americans categorically refuse to use anything other than Apple Products, we would have the balance of power in federal government.
Now that I think of it, Steve Jobs “Thoughts on Flash” http://www.apple.com/hotnews/thoughts-on-flash/ reads very much like Humanae Vitae.
outlines 6 problems with the Flash Player and makes predictions on what would happen to a mobile device running it (reduced user satisfaction, reduced battery life, lowest common denominator problems when trying to commoditize the underlying hardware).
I’m sure funnier people than me *cough* Jeff *cough* could do up a “what if Steve Jobs wrote Humanae Vitae”
What’s with the crankiness?
Humans are designed to be religious. But we can also be idolatrous. I think the worst thing you can say about this study is that it “scientifically proves” something we already know from experience.