I don’t know whether or not the article is out of place in The Guardian but I did relate to it’s painful truth. I have come full circle from a boss of a small company who wouldn’t hire single mothers bc they were unreliable, to being a single mother myself.
“There is no kudos in being a mum, only in being other things – such as thin, or the boss – despite being a mum. Motherhood is a form of handicap.”
I was surprised at the response when I was pregnant with my 4th. I guess there is a definite “acceptable family size” that ends at 3 kids because with the looks and comments I got pregnant with 3 kids in tow, you would have thought that I had just murdered someone!
Thanks for linking this. Let me suggest everyone email her at the Guardian (see link for her email with the article) with thank yous and encouragement to keep it up. I did, and we should support a voice as good as this one, especially when she is right.
Thanks, Fr. Stephanos! I’m going to add that to my list.
I only have three, but I’ve already been asked, “How many are you gonna have?!” Apparently where I live, one or two is the acceptable number of children.
My mom says that the “How could you do this” comments decrease after a certain number of children, and instead there’s more positive feedback (e.g., the ‘I could never do that sort of thing’ admiration). I had to ask because I don’t remember from before we reached that point (I’m the second oldest of the ten children, but my memory doesn’t go that far back).
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I am expecting #10 next month. My favorite reply to the Fertility Police is:
“We’re thinking of this one as a middle child.”
Perhaps it is in just the right place, in the Guardian.
I don’t know whether or not the article is out of place in The Guardian but I did relate to it’s painful truth. I have come full circle from a boss of a small company who wouldn’t hire single mothers bc they were unreliable, to being a single mother myself.
“There is no kudos in being a mum, only in being other things – such as thin, or the boss – despite being a mum. Motherhood is a form of handicap.”
sad, but true.
I was surprised at the response when I was pregnant with my 4th. I guess there is a definite “acceptable family size” that ends at 3 kids because with the looks and comments I got pregnant with 3 kids in tow, you would have thought that I had just murdered someone!
I have a friend with seven kids so far.
Whenever someone asks him when he’s going to stop, he just says, “When we get an ugly one.”
Thanks for linking this. Let me suggest everyone email her at the Guardian (see link for her email with the article) with thank yous and encouragement to keep it up. I did, and we should support a voice as good as this one, especially when she is right.
Thanks, Fr. Stephanos! I’m going to add that to my list.
I only have three, but I’ve already been asked, “How many are you gonna have?!” Apparently where I live, one or two is the acceptable number of children.
I tell people “I have three… so far.”
I am the proud member of a family with ten children. Big families ROCK!
My mom says that the “How could you do this” comments decrease after a certain number of children, and instead there’s more positive feedback (e.g., the ‘I could never do that sort of thing’ admiration). I had to ask because I don’t remember from before we reached that point (I’m the second oldest of the ten children, but my memory doesn’t go that far back).