You’re a progressive Catholic and you want to deepen your faith what do you do? Of course you can read Commonweal, America, and the New York Times to keep up – but sometimes you just want to kick back and be informed by watching TV. Sure there is much fare on TV that aligns with your world view, but don’t you want more? Have you ever stumbled upon on that 24 hour so-called Catholic network only to be shocked by women still shackled in religious garb, lack of inclusive language, and televised Masses partially in Latin, and a nun who dared to criticize our hero Cardinal Mahony? In his case we are totally against dissent. You know what station we mean and didn’t you just wish that we had our own station?
Well don’t wish any longer. We at Progressive Word Television Network (PWTN) are coming soon to a cable and satellite operation near you. We will offer the highest quality in progressive programming with a 24 hour dialogue hotline for show suggestions and improvements. Sound too good to be true? Well just check out our new line up.
Our flagship live call-in talk show with Sister Joan Chittister, OSB. She will have guests you love like Gary Wills, Father Richard McBrien, Sister Jeanine Grammick, and many more. In fact we also have so many Jesuits to choose from that we can book the show years in advance. You’ll love Earth Mother Joan’s teachings and conversations where she will channel the spirit of Vatican II live. Get great fashion tips on what goes best with earth tone pant suits, sensible shoes, and other polyester wear. You’ll laugh at her recurring gag soliciting funds to support the network “Please send your donation between your Planned Parenthood and Electric bill.”
On mondays at 8 PM on “The Journey from Rome” we will have a guest describe their conversion experience. Markus Growdie the host will interview those who have finally come to the conclusion that following some bookish celibate old guy from Rome in matters pertaining to the struggles of daily life is really wrong. The Journey from Rome delves into how the convert has come to their infallible decision that the Pope speaking on faith in morals is fallible. Conversion stories of many experiences are chronicled as some move from Protestantism to Catholicism and finally Catholic-Protestantism since we Catholics don’t have to follow the Pope or some of the the teachings of the Church either. The theme of the show is how to swim the Tiber without getting wet.
Wednesday’s at 10 PM tune in for “The Dark Night of the Saul” hosted by Notre Dame scholar Father Richard P. McBrien. This program explores how King Saul has been misunderstood and given a bum rap. King Saul was unjustly punished by the Lord for not waiting for Samuel to arrive and he offered the sacrifices himself, an act then prohibited. We can understand King Saul’s yearning for the priesthood and the fact that there was inequality in that those who were not from the Levitical tribe were banned from the priesthood. Father McBrien explains the modern parallels where women yearning to become priests are denied equality with the tribe of men. King Saul was really the Rosa Parks of priestly ordination. King Saul’s disobedience to the Lord was punished where instead he should have been celebrated for having followed his conscience and meaning well. King Saul also supported dialogue in that he was willing even to have the Witch of Endor call up the spirit of the prophet Samuel to dialogue with.
If you have ever been angered by Karl Keating, Jimmy Akin, and company misrepresenting the true Catholic faith with their smug answers taken from the so-called “teachings” of the Church you will love our new show “Heterodox Answers Live.”. Our panel includes experts on the Church from Public Television who conduct a roundtable discussion with Bishop Gumbleton and answer your phone calls. You’ll learn why Scripture, Apostolic Tradition, and the Church Fathers really didn’t mean what they wrote and how it is the modern mind that is more able to interpret their actual words. Bishop Gumbleton as progressive apologist offers arguments against false doctrines such as sola-magisterium where people actually expect a doctrine to have to be taught in magisterial documents. He also explains why Catholic devotions are not idol worship, but in fact just passe and just so pre-Vatican II. You will love his explanations in support of women’s ordination and homosexual sex with such memorable quotes as “homosexuals make love more humanely, largely because they are better able empathetically to feel what their partner is feeling.”
Daily Mass
Daily Mass is held outside of our studios at Our Lady of the Snows retreat center where Mass is always relevant.
We at the Progressive Word Television Network are concerned with more than just your spiritual health, but also your physical heath.
With Dominican Sisters from across the United States we will have your sacred heart pumping as you walk around our home labyrinths or experience the relief from stress with the centering aspects of T’ai Chi Chih. Walking around and around until your dizzy in our labyrinths will make your mind even more attuned to the theology taught on PWTN.
Enneagram I Workshop with facilitator Marilyn Carpenter, OSB who has a BS from Regis College, Denver; an MA in Theology and Pastoral Ministry from St. Meinrad’s in Indiana; and an MA in Clinical Psychology from Antioch University-West. She is certified as a hospital chaplain by the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops. She will lead you step by step to find which one of the nine personality types you belong to and to also help you with dream work and understanding the dream journey process.
Future Shows
Call to Action in coordination with Voice of the Faithful are currently working on developing a youth related show “Life off the Rock” Just as soon as they receive some members under forty or hire actors to play young progressive Catholics in love with their faith we will put the series into production. We are working on getting show teaching progressive Catholic sexual morality and hope to air “Sex in the City” soon. We are also currently working on creating our own radio network and just as soon as we can create some programming that isn’t redundant with NPR.
So please call your cable and satellite operation and request PWTN. We are confident that there is a demand for progressive Catholic programming and just know that you will be smart enough to choose us. When progressive Catholics have equal airtime we are confident people will rush to our intelligent and nuance arguments and we will be just as commercially successful as Air America. So for the best in progressive programming don’t forget PWTN!
79 comments
“Guess we don’t all have business-owning parents who wanted to pay for our holy trips to Europe . . . “
Wow. I’m a young orthodox Catholic who went to WYD in Toronto. Where the hell is my father’s Halliburton?
Hey it’s my favorite nun… “Sr. Bilbo Baggins!”
http://angrytwins.blogspot.com/2005/05/sr-joans-twin.html
LOL…Curt, you’re a precious resource. This will be more effective with some adults than years of catechesis!
BTW, this parody has got a mention over at Pontifications, where I’m co-moderator.
There should be a show called This New Cathedral with Cardinal Mahoney showing off all the newest in design and use of space.
For children’s programs you could have His Banner Over Me is Love a children’s craft show. Each week the kids would make a different craft item with no explanation whatsoever as to how it related to their faith life. Oh wait a minute that describes every year of my faith formation from 6th grade through high school. Flash backs are so horrible.
Now I have to go lie down.
Thanks for the laughs.
There should be a show called This New Cathedral with Cardinal Mahoney showing off all the newest in design and use of space.
For children’s programs you could have His Banner Over Me is Love a children’s craft show. Each week the kids would make a different craft item with no explanation whatsoever as to how it related to their faith life. Oh wait a minute that describes every year of my faith formation from 6th grade through high school. Flash backs are so horrible.
Now I have to go lie down.
Thanks for the laughs.
superb!!! LOL!!! LOL!!! whoo-hoo!!!
As a born Catholic who grew up to see the true light of secular science and humanism, all I have to say is…wow, you guys are losers. “Hey guys, let’s mock those who only agree with us on 99% of the issues. God will love that!”
Go molest some kids and cover it up, you sickos. (Happened in MY school)
I needed this today. This is one of the funniest things I’ve seen in a long while…
Theologienne,
Yes, a nun, whatever her age, ought to wear her habit. Same should apply regarding priests and cassocks. I don’t recall ever seeing Chittister in a habit, so I guess she stopped wearing a habit well before her sixties, if she ever wore one in the first place. And I guess by thousands you actually mean less than one thousand. Those I know who went to WYD had to save up much of their allowances and take extra part-time jobs for the past 3 years to help pay for the trip. They were all orthodox Catholics aged between 18 to 21. As a 21-year old college student, I’ve got to say that none of the Catholic students I know are heterodox.
Pedro,
Please explain from a secular humanist position, why the secular humanist Supreme Court judge Ruth Bader Ginsberg is incorrect in advocating not only that laws relating to sexuality should be abolished and that the age of consent should be lowered to 14. While you are doing that, explain why the secular humanist organization is allowed to cover up thousands of cases of statutory rape each year in order to preserve customers. Perhaps you can explain why the secular humanist public school system is given a pass on sexual abuse with zero accountability. In the realm of science, please explain to us why a secular humanist “scientist” was allowed to conduct sexual experiments on children, collect data from active sexual perverts, and publish reports. Explain why this same individual was recently lionized by a major motion picture with no outcry from the enlightened secular humanist society.
Could it be that the “light” that you saw was nothing more than revisionist propaganda by the secular humanist media outlets?
I love a good parody! good job!!
1. Ginsberg was talking about lowering the statutory rape age to 14 when the other partner was ALSO a minor, in order to prevent, say, a 13 year old getting arrested for “raping” a 14 year old. It might not be good for kids that young to experiment, but they shouldn’t be called rapists for it.
2. I don’t know what organization you are talking about, perhaps Planned Parenthood. Well, I’m no fan of abortion, I don’t know anyone who is, but if the govt wont take care of these issues, then private organizations have to. Now, if they wanted an increase in customers, why would they hand out condoms all the time, thus preventing pregnancy and abortions??
3. I don’t know what sexual abuse you are talking about. I do know about female teachers being arrested for rape when they have relationships with their male students, as they should. At MY catholic school, the only rapist was Father Gage, who was NOT arrested, but sent off to another school, while our school lied and said he was off visiting the Vatican. Years later, when the student left school, they sent a letter setting the record straight. Hardly a suitable reaction.
4. Kinsey? Didn’t see it. However I don’t see the harm in collecting data on anything. And I’m pretty sure he wasn’t doing “sexual experiments” on children in the way you are imagining.
And the media I see isn’t shy about mentioning God, prayer and faith, even where it doesn’t belong (like a science class).
No, I believe my conversion came from a solid education (Catholic, ironically) and an open mind. Give it a shot.
1. I mistakenly typed age 14 when it is in fact 12. And the lowering of the age of consent in statutory rape cases advocated by Ms. Ginsberg simply does not apply only to when the “other partner” is a minor. If the “other partner” is under 18, then it is not a statutory rape case at all. It is the age of consent that applies in this case. The point in this case is that neither you nor Ms. Ginsberg have any ethical basis for drawing any behavioral lines anywhere.
2. The policy of Planned Parenthood to cover up cases of statutory rape, contrary to law and morality is widespread and demonstrated. Planned Parenthood hands out condoms because it is part of an ideology that sees sexual activity as a harmless recreation. When children are conceived (with or without condoms), they must then die and PP makes money.
3. Dr. Alfred Kinsey says that Father Gage’s behavior is perfectly normal and healthy and it is only the narrow-minded fundamentalists that have conditioned us to find it repulsive. Can you explain to us how he is wrong and the fundamentalists are right?
4. Kinsey not only performed such experiments, but he hired and collected data from pedophiles. This is all documented, and well established. The specific behavioral and response information gathered by Kinsey isn’t the kind of data that one can cognize directly. Think about it.. Just because you have some vague faith that such a “respected scientist” would never do such a bad thing doesn’t make it so. In fact, it is exactly the same mindset that makes scandalous coverup possible. Look into your own mind and heart to see how “Father Gage” was given a pass.
Science is based on empiricism, which follows evidence without arriving at deductively certain truths. The dogma of naturalism or materialism is neither empiricism nor science. It is a narrow-minded creed that is afraid at any objective look or viewpoint which contradicts itself.
Riiight, now its MY fault that my latin teacher was a pedofile priest (when I was in 7th grade).
Don’t try these little logic games with me. I have a philosophy degree, so while I acknowledge your ideas on ethics, empiricism, judicial activism and movies I’ve never seen, I regret to inform you that they are both false and invalid. Even at Notre Dame they could teach you as much.
And you take the pseudonym of a famed Nazi because…? Were you in the same Nazi batallion as the pope?
Hey, lighten up Paco.
git ‘r done
It’s all just so much hot air. Catholic dogma is, as is all religious dogma, meaningless to those outside the faithful. Believe what you wish. It’s the Catholic Church’s forays into the political realm without the loss of their tax exempt status to which I object.
Wonderful parody of the Network the Bishops couldn’t build – money a problem then – what a missed opportunity. I’ll bet their frugality then haunts them daily. The drivel that generally passes for programming here make me embarrassed. Marcus deserves a pass for probably the only show that speaks to the common people on the coversion experience. Pee Wee Herman is good comic relief. Not nice to make fun of Sr. Joan that way. As a former Abbess in days of yore she had the power/authority/etc. of a Bishop on Monastery lands. Eyebrow-raising for the PC-RC’s to be attacking a ‘Bishop’.
‘Catholic’in our tradition was always an INCLUSIVE term, taking a Jesus lead here – certainly the first few centuries witness to that.
The Exclusive PC- Neo Con – RC’s want to paint us as Tradition bearers from Apostolic times when, in fact, that tradition has evolved mid- much give and take over the centuries to the present.
We are the Church – thank you Vat II- and only after a thorough airing of all sides can some agreement be achieved and formalized. Who’s to say that some future Church people might not cast it differently. Christ’s Spirit is alive and well(for the most part) in the Church – not some museum. She will guide her Sons and Daughters to do the right thing. Guide not command. I’ve run out of time here. Thanks for the opportunity.
The bishops actually spent a lot on their TV project. Media guy Roger McCaffrey once calculated that the money was enough to buy every US Catholic a personal phone call from Pope John Paul II. All that for a system that didn’t distribute programs for home viewing, but only to institutions. It’s a good thing a spunky nun and some capable lay people went and got the job done without the help of the bureaucracy.
Read Humanae Vitae, Pedro. Pope Paul VI knew contrception would lead to an ever increasing number of abortions and it has come to pass. Planned Parenthood, the spawn of Satan, knows exactly what it’s doing in handing out condoms.
Philisophy isn’t logic, is it?
Sad but true. I am saddened by and for those who are lost, may they be forgiven even though they may/may not know what they do. Please see: http://www.defide.com/
How about a show like, “My Favorite Mahony”, “Mahony’s Heretics”, “Who wants to be a Mahony?”, “Mind of Mahony”, “Mahony is the Beast (of Revelations)”, “McCarrick and Mohamed”, “McCarricks Fatwah”
Presided by Pope JPII: http://www.vatican.va/news_services/liturgy/documents/travels/index_photo_assisi_en.html
“The streets of Hell are paved with the skulls of bishops”
– St. Athanasius and/or St. John Chrysostom
Blogworthies LXX
Blogworthies: A round-up of noteworthy entries from a variety of weblogs on a variety of topics.
I have been reading Raymond Arroyo’s new biography of Mother Angelica and I am in awe of her trust in Divine Providence, and the degree to which that trust has been both challenged adn confirmed. Arroyo also gives a fairly clear analysis of the early struggle between the bishops’ forays into broadcasting and Mother Angelica’s orthodox Catholic network (despite her rather unorthodox business model) The book is a clear eye opener in that it underscores the importance of EWTN for Catholicism in the United States in the past twenty years. The “Bishops’ newtwork” was largely run by beuracrats working for the hierarchy while Mother’s network was borne by the sweat and blood of a nun (who is a woman and NOT clergy!) and a dedicated group of lay people (even some protestants) The book is a must read if we are to really appreciate the role of EWTN in the Catholic resistance to the designs of the buerecrats over at USCC.
HI
I think it would be to put PWTN between your phone-sex and pornography bills. But in all seriousness…I would exhort all of us to committ to a holy hour once a week for these heretics’ conversions. We have a great opportunity here for prayer and help save a soul. Pax Domine
Very very funny – a tonic, in fact!
Hey, shouldn’t that be ‘Sex in the Holy City’ ?
You forgot these great shows!
Traditional Latin Ebonics -twelve lessons in folk rap by Fr. Stan Fortuna who traces Catholic Hip-Hop and the automobile to first century Catholicism
I’m infallible, you’re infallible…but the Pope….I just don’t get it -Fr. Hans Kung, though you can call him Hans
Where isn’t it in postconciliar Tradition? -by Patrick Madrid. If you thought you knew about postconciliar tradition, think again. Pat will prove that the early popes weren’t just ecumenical, but that the postconciliar popes are from another planet.
The New World Over – Raymond Arroyo attempts to learn ecclesiastical ebonics from his “hermano” Fr. Stan Fortuna
Lord, where have they taken you? -Fr. Groeschel in this hour long series visits parishes across the country leading parishoners through the secret chambers and codes, passwords and retinal scans to Adoration.
Extreme Makeover: Wrechovation Edition – Cardinal Egan, ArchBishop of NYC leads this half hour weekly program, bullhorn in hand, demolishing almost pristine 100+ year old churches in exchange for triangular shaped ones. Don’t miss this week as His Eminence attempts to wreckovate with Catholics inside the building
yes.this is my site http://opaopavottakzhopa.islandmix.com/soma/soma_music.html Thanks.
http://volokh.com/archives/archive_2005_09_25-2005_10_01.shtml#1128101678
[Eugene Volokh, September 30, 2005 at 1:34pm] 0 Trackbacks / Possibly More Trackbacks
It Looks Like Justice Ginsburg Likely Was the Victim of a Drafting Error after all; and it looks like I erroneously failed to recognize just how likely this was to be an error.
Here’s what I wrote on the subject when I first dealt with it last year:
[The] Sex Bias in the U.S. Code [report] was prepared for the Commission by former ACLU lawyer Brenda Feigen-Fasteau, then-professor Ruth Bader Ginsburg, and 15 Columbia Law School students working under their supervision. The reporters went through federal statutes, identified various sex-based classifications and terms, and suggested ways to eliminate them. In the process, here’s what the report said on p. 95 about the relevant statu[t]e, 18 U.S.C. � 2032:
………
I just don’t understand why we have to legislate morality now. Why can’t we go back to asking people “Do you accept Catholocism as the one true faith?” And if they say no, kill them. They don’t deserve to live. I must say when I get to heaven, it just won’t be the same, with nothing but catholics around, who will I deplore and make fun of? You people need to understand, this is not about love and all that cr$#, it’s about judging your neighbor so Jesus doesn’t have to later on. If you ever begin to lose faith, just remember those inspirational words, “Love thy neighbor, unless he’s a protestant of course.” Basically what Jesus was trying to say was, spread the word, and if people don’t want to hear the word, force them to listen, and if that doesn’t work, take em out!
Comments are closed.