Men's Issues

People in the church who call themselves progressives frequently call for the church to address women’s issues. Progressives completely skip talking about progressing on men’s issues. There are some major inequalities in the way the church treats men. I would like to address some of these men’s issues from a more progressive progressives viewpoint.

Brothers are second class citizens. Why can’t men go into the convents and become sisters? Sure men can become brothers, but everybody knows that they are treated differently then nuns and their status is deemphasized. Even the secular society sees this inequality. Are there movies or TV shows about the Singing Brother, Flying Brother, or Brother Act? Where are the Brother art critics on PBS. Why does Dead Men Walking have a sister talking? Do you hear stories about strict brothers brandishing rulers? Where are the movies attacking laundries run by brothers? Even Christopher Hitchens doesn’t waste his time attacking Catholic Brothers. Do brothers get to wear nifty head-ware like nuns? No they get stuck with just a cowl which is not exactly the most flattering fashion accessory. There are no difference in Greek or Jew in Christ, yet we maintains this difference between sisters/brothers. Italy has a musical for Mother Teresa, but where are the musical celebrating Catholic Brothers? There is a glass ceiling imposed on brothers that keep them from rising to the same level as sisters.

Exclusive Male Biblical Texts. Who is the greatest saint? The Virgin Mary of course. No generations are calling any man as being blessed. Go to any daily Mass and you will find that the majority of people there are women. At the Cross we have a high infusions of Mary’s but only the Apostle John was there to represent the men. In an act of unbelievable bias all of St. Joseph’s lines were cut from the Gospels. The thread of thought in the Bible is exclusive toward men. Mary gets some choice lines and even gets to recite the Magnificat while Joseph is suppose to just shut up. Gabriel went first to Mary and only later let St. Joseph in on what was really going on. In the meantime poor St. Joseph was agonizing over what was happening. Zachariah makes a mistake in doubting that Elizabeth would become pregnant and again a man is made to shut up for a considerable length of time. Angels have this bad habit of dismissing the husbands. An angel let the mother of Sampson in on what was going to happen first and only later let the husband know. At the Presentation Simeon tells Mary that a sword will piece her heart without even a howdy-do to Joseph. Then St. Joseph just totally disappears from he story, no mention of what happened to him. Mary gets assumed and crowned, while Joseph is still waiting in line with everyone else for the second coming to get a body. Mary gets prominently mentioned in the Book of Revelations, but no mention of her hubby. We use to have a lock on the Doctor’s of the Church, but now women have swept the series in the last century.

Churches. Males our always getting hit for being the ones running the church. But is this really true. Call any church to make an appointment with the pastor. Will the phone be answered by a man, probably not. Look at the makeup of all the committees and then tell me males rule the church. If the common male truly ran the church then the interiors would look much different. For one we would generally have more stained glass windows of smiting and of Jesus knocking over the money lenders tables. How about a window of the view the David got staring down at Bathsheba? Men would never have come up with going to Mass on Sundays during football season. Men would have stratoloungers with beverage holders instead of plain pews. We would light bottle rockets instead of candles for prayer intentions and have beer and pretzels after Mass. There would be fishing retreats where we could listen to spiritual talks while fishing, if it was good enough for St. Peter and the boys it is good enough for us.

Multiple Opposite Sex Attraction Progressives are always trying to mainstream homosexual sex even though it totally goes against God’s plan for us. Well if we are going to ignore scripture and tradition in relation to these people, then why can’t we also do this for the average male. Most males are continuously attracted by other females. Why can’t we have sex with whomever we desire. Males can maintain and sustain a lifetime committed relationship until they are ready for the next lifetime committed relationship. Why should societal taboos that want a male to be faithful to whoever they are currently with be maintained. This is the 21st century why should we allow the medieval forced slavery of marriage and such to keep to keep us from our true natures. Why are there no Adulterers Pride parades? Where are the fornicator or adultery support groups. Why aren’t we allowed in the schools to promote tolerance of promiscuous heterosexual sex and unfaithful relationships. When some guy gets murdered for being caught in bed with someone’s wife where is the media outcry for this hate crime? Where are the complaints about these extramaritalphobes? This century we have made many inroads in males being able to act like they choose, but there are still barriers. St. Bill Clinton pray for us.

Contraception To guarantee our rights as free males we need contraception. How can we use women as sex objects and then move on if their is a possibility of a child resulting and incurring financial responsibilities on us. This is my wallet! Why should anybody be able to make decisions over my wallet? Why should the government interfere and force me to be responsible for possible offspring at the point of a gun? We are pro-wallet and while we support the right of other males to distribute from their wallet, we want to have full control over our wallets. Luckily the feminists have done much to help our agenda and pretty much we are able to use women as we desire.

Abortion. While we are theoretically against abortion since half those killed are males, as long as contraception is not 100% we still need it to protect are lifestyles and our wallets. Why should any females force on us the obligations of fatherhood? The government also needs to pay for these abortions since this issue again affects our wallets. What about male predators that are financially poor, why should they have to change their lifestyle because they can’t afford to pay for any resulting abortions. We will never be free to act as long as others can force responsibilities on us

Regular progressives have always been good at ignoring scripture and tradition and obedience is something they send their dogs to school for. We progressive progressives have some common goals with the regular progressives and we must work to change the church instead of ourselves. We can work toward perfection by making nothing sinful. We can work hand in hand with regular progressives to continue to destroy marriage and other inhibiting institutions.